No Monster or Eraser Prepared Us For This!
by the-fan-girl-1234
Summary: The flock, Annabeth, and Percy all attend a boarding school in New York. All their short tempers don't mix well with the strict teachers. Will they all get expelled on their first day? Will they give up on school when the dean says the Flock can't all dorm together and no rooms are co-ed? Hilarious antics are sure to insure as these characters try to survive school. T for paranoia
1. Chapter 1- the new school

**DISCLAIMER- Sadly, I do not own Percy Jackson or Maximum Ride. **

Percy's pov

I walked into what I assumed to be the main office, Annabeth clutching my hand hard enough to cut of circulation. We had decided to try school together this year. We're in New York, close enough to easily get to Camp Half-Blood together.

"May I help you?" a very perky receptionist asked in a voice a full octave higher than the most annoying voice I can tolerate.

"Umm….." I mumbled, I had no idea if I could trust the cheeriness in her inhumanly high voice. My hand went to Riptide.

"Yes, we are Percy and Annabeth; it's our first day and we were told to come here." Wow, nice lie Annabeth, we don't even know if this is the right school.

'Yes, yes! I have your schedules right here! Well just wait for the other new students and I'll tell you everything you need to know!" she said and I sat, wondering who else would come. It was the middle of the second marking period, quite an odd time to start school. Annabeth and I were only late because we had just returned from a long quest.

Just as my patience wore thin, my leg bouncing as Annabeth clicked a pen, ADHD working against us, a group of six kids walked in. The oldest girl looked even more skeptical than us.

"Here they are!" the woman exclaimed. Then she asked, "Are you the Rides? The girl replied "Yup, I'm Max, he's F- I mean Nick, that's Jeff, he's Zephyr, she's Monique, and that's Ariel." The receptionist frantically passed out papers trying to keep up with who Max pointed to. Monique and Ariel looked excited to be here, while Zephyr looked incredibly bored. Max and Nick looked like they rather be anywhere but here. Iggy had an odd expression, his eyes unfocused and betraying the annoyed expression his mouth gave.

"Ariel, Zephyr, and Monique's teacher should be here shortly." The woman said as the teacher came down the hall towards them. Each teacher took their student and headed towards their classes.

"Now, you 5 have all requested to be roomed with your siblings, and you 2 wish to be as close as possible, but dorms only hold two students and the rooms are not co-ed. The rooms you got are all over the place, so I'll call housing and sort this out… Come back later for you rooms. For now here are your schedules." Annabeth and I glanced at ours, the words swimming around the page. Thank god Max asked to see ours and compare classes, in more of a forced tone than a friendly one. We all compared and it turned out we each had identical classes. Good, we can just follow them.

Turned out first period we had a class called Reading and Writing. **(A/N- I've also heard this class called literature, lit class, and IRLA and some schools don't teach it, so sorry if you don't know what it is. Basically you read short stories and write essays and poetry etc. it's not very fun because you never so creative writing and the novels and short stories are usually boring.)**_GREAT!_ I thought to myself_. A class where all you do is read and write._ This will be torture to Annabeth and me, because we are both dyslexic.

As we entered the class, the teacher told us to introduce ourselves and state the last book we'd read. Turns out the Rides read about as much as we do. Then we sat and the teacher gave us the novel we'd be reading. The title was written in a very swirly cursive, and I have absolutely no idea what it said. I wish Grover were here to tell me, but he's starting to look a little old to pass for a high school student. Annabeth looked about as lost as I did.

"Percy, seeing as you're new why don't you start us off by reading pages 1 thru 10 aloud." The teacher clearly said as more of a statement than a question. I opened the book to find that not only the tile, but the whole book was written in the cursive I couldn't read.

"ummm…" I managed while trying to decode the first word, I thought it said farting, so I knew I was wrong.

"Percy!" the teacher said sternly. "Spit it out! I do NOT have time for shy students or fear of public speaking."

"Actually," I started trying to sound calm and epically failing. Come on, this lady was really annoying me. "I'm not shy or scared of public speaking." I needed to stop and breathe because I really didn't want to be expelled on my first day. "I'm dyslexic and this font is murder." I said dryly. She seemed to not truly believe me but backed off for now.

"Alright then, Annabeth, since you've been inseparable from Percy all morning, maybe you'd like to redeem your boyfriend?" "And while you're at, it stop with the pen clicking!" She added, obviously ticked off by Annabeth's habit.

"Same as Percy, actually. I haven't got a clue what the first word on this page is. Oh, and the clicking and his leg tapping are because were also both ADHD." Annabeth said very calmly and sweetly. I really have to ask her how she stays so calm.

"Fine!" Mrs. A **(A/N- Yeah, I'm bad with names) **obviously frustrated said while checking her seating chart.

"Nick, is it?" she asked the boy I knew to be James.

"Nah, that's Nick." he said pointing at the desk somewhere near his brother. "I'm James, but I'd prefer it if you called me Iggy. Nick prefers Fang, too."

"Alright,_ Iggy_, would you care to read pages 1-10?" she asked forcing cheeriness.

"Actually," he began.

"So help me if you use the same excuse as them!" Mrs. A said before regaining her composure. "And look me in the eyes when you speak."

"I was going to say…" and was cut off again by an exasperated Mrs. A saying-

"I said to look me in the eyes! Looking over my shoulder is incredibly impolite, JAMES."

"So is interrupting me, Mrs. A" Iggy said, forcing himself not to snap at her further.

"If you do not quit being rude, so help me Mr. Ride!" Mrs. A said, her tone cold as ice.

At this point Iggy gave up on any attempt not to get kicked out.

"YOU KNOW WHAT'S EVEN MORE RUDE!? REPEATEDLY YELLING AT A **BLIND** GUY FOR NOT LOOKING YOU IN THE EYES! OR FOR HIS INIBILITY TO READ!"

At this, Mrs. A turned bright red, embarrassed for her insensitivity. "Sorry Iggy! The three of you follow me." She said ushering us into a small closest type room attached to the main classroom. She was extra carful to move everything off the floor and stay out of Iggy's way, which just seemed to annoy him more. "Say in here, this is an audio-book of the chapters we'll be reading. I only have one other copy, so try to meet up tonight to listen to the homework chapters. I'll have housekeeping send a CD player to your floor" she said handing Annabeth the tape. We listened to the two chapters much faster than how long it took the rest of the class to read them. Thinking Iggy couldn't see us, and therefore wouldn't rat us for breaking the no contact rule, I began to kiss Annabeth.

Iggy cleared his throat loudly. "If you two are going to make out at least have the courtesy to warn me to bring a girl for myself!" Iggy mock complained. Note to self, don't kiss in front of Iggy.

A few minutes of awkward silence later, the bell rang and the five of us headed to our next class.


	2. Chapter 2- classes classes are no fun

Max's pov

Well, reading and writing was… interesting. Then we all made our way to Science. To avoid more drama lamas like first period… wait, did I just say drama llama? **ANGEL GET OUT OF MY HEAD!** _Sorry!_ **Whatever**, to avoid another incident, Percy, Annabeth, and Iggy all started out by announcing their various… issues… to the class and teacher. Then we found out a lab was beginning today, in groups of five. Naturally, he grouped us all together. He was wary of Iggy being a safety hazard, but we assured Mr. B **(A/N and my impeccable naming skills continue!J) **That as his siblings, me and fang would keep him safe. If anything Iggy was the most qualified for this class! Then we found out what the lab was, building a stink bomb. Yup, Iggy is definitely the most qualified one. Mr. B encouraged variations, and who ever made the most impressive stink bomb won an A on the lab without having to write the report or anything. I turned to Iggy, who assured me he could build one in the period that would blow Mr. B away. So we basically sat back and let Ig do all the work while we watched moving only to look wary and careful when Mr. B came over and saw Iggy handling chemicals unattended.

With 10 minutes left in class everyone came over to Mr. B, who called all of our next class' teacher to let them know we would be a little late. Then he led us outside, far away from the classroom. He said we could go towards the end, to see what everyone else did. Compared to Ig and Gaz's most trivial stink bombs, they were mediocre at best. Only two groups left, us and some girl named Jamie who agreed to go before us because, and I quote "it's not like they'll be any completion" and proceeded to inform us that she had won for every lab all year. Her stink bomb looked like one the one Iggy literally made in his sleep with nothing but table salt last month. After listening to it, and smelling it, Iggy started cackling manically.

"Watch and learn!" he proclaimed. Mr. B shot me a look _like shouldn't you being doing this and he be off somewhere sheltered? _

"He is the one who built it." I said plainly.

Jamie chuckled, confident in her win.

Iggy stepped up to the platform we were to throw them at. He set off his stink bomb and I have to be honest, it smelled worse than Gazzy, on a good day. Nothing beats Gazzy on a bad day.

Jamie honestly looked like she was going to faint. Serves her right! "Yeah Iggy!" I said as I slapped him on the back. He was going to need the enthusiasm. Our next class was art and I knew he wasn't going to like it much.

**FANG'S POV-**

Iggy really nailed it in science. Thank god none of us have to do that lab report or else we all would've failed. But I don't think he'll be saving us in art any time soon. Percy and Annabeth seem really cool too. They're always on guard, just like us. Heck, maybe they'll be good at art and that's another class I don't have to worry about failing.

As we walked in Mrs. P plopped down worksheets, informed us that we were extremely late, and sat at her desk. I quietly informed her of Iggy's blindness, because I could tell she was going to yell at him to keep his eyes on his own paper. What was with these teachers!?

She walked over to Iggy, and I was afraid of what she was going to say next. But I just sat, and shifted slightly in my seat feeling myself go invisible. No need to draw attention to myself. Percy looked at me questioningly and I replied a look that I hope said something like _he's a big boy, he can take care of himself. _She told him this class probably wasn't going to work out, and if he wanted to he could switch to foods next door. She added that if anyone needed to go with him, we could leave now. All five of us ran out the door.

When we walked in a very cheery thirty something year old woman greeted us and told us today we'd be making pancakes. Good. Iggy can handle that. He started off towards the stove to heat the pan and Mrs. H quickly ushered him to a seat, worried he was going to burn himself. I told her he could handle himself, and just to show off he flipped each pancake obnoxiously in her face. Way to go Ig. We sat and ate; Percy obviously impressed and strangely happy that Iggy had complied with his request to die his pancakes blue. Percy is weird.

In gym we sparred, me and Max pinning each other violently. Percy and Annabeth were fighting just as hard next to us. Everyone else was either starring at us or at Iggy trying to convince coach hedge to let him fight. Finally, he agreed that Iggy could fight him. We all stopped to watch Iggy kick his ass. Coach told Iggy where he was and stood still. I tapped his hand twice, and Iggy quickly shot his arm out to grab coach's wrist. He then kicked him in the place no one wants to get hit, sending all the males in the room flinching, and then flipped him. This all happened in a matter of seconds.

Then we had English, were we were also reading, and Ig went with Percy and Annabeth to listen to the chapters. The teacher forced me to read aloud, and I been shot her death glares all period. I hate that class. Then we had lunch which was boring. Ancient Greek wasn't very fun, but apparently Percy and Annabeth are fluent. I'll be cheating off of them on the tests. After that we had math, which is a foreign language, and I can't talk about the evils that went down in that room. Let's just say Algebra is not my friend. Last we had social studies, something about Ancient China I think, I slept thru most of the period anyway. Now we have to go get Angel, Gazzy, and Nudge and go get our dorm assignments.


	3. Chapter 3- dorms

Annabeth's pov

I didn't know school could be so boring! I can't imagine how much Percy must be hating this, and all the teachers have really bad attitudes.

Max just collected her little sisters and brother. Now we are going to the office to find out our dorm assignments. When we arrived the perky lady from this morning was gone, replaced by an old woman whose lips were pressed into a scowl.

"Were supposed to be picking up our dorm assignments." Max said, boredom evident in her voice. The woman handed me a list of names, and I walked away. The woman gave me a bad feeling.

When we were a decent distance from the office, I pulled the paper out of my pocket. Not surprisingly it was written in you guessed it, the same script as the book earlier.

"Max, I… um…, can't read this." I whispered so low I was sure she couldn't hear it. She just held her hand out.

"Alright, were on the fourth floor, it has five rooms and we have all of them. There also a common room at the end of the floor. It says that the room are final and switching is strictly prohibited. The assignments are: Fang and Gazzy, Iggy and Percy, Max and Annabeth, and Nudge and Angel."

_Great!_ I thought. I get stuck with the bossy bitch. DON'T SAY THAT ABOUT MAX, YOURE THE BOSSY BITCH! A voice strikingly similar to the little blond ones said in my head. What the hell? Now I have voices in my head. Whatever, I need to talk to Percy. I head over to his room and the blind one is still sitting there. WE HAVE NAMES YOU KNOW! I hear in the child's voice again. This is really starting to freak me out.

"Iggy, can you give me and Percy some privacy?" I asked.

"What, is the Tonsil Hockey team playing another game so soon!?" he replied. That sexist pig.

"Whatever!" I replied, while both glaring and sticking my tongue out at him. Which was, of course, completely lost on him.

"IG, she serious. She's giving you a Max glare, and sticking her tongue out. Chick's got skill. You better leave, doors at 4 o' clock." Fang informed her in the most words I'd ever heard him say. I would have to ask Max if this was an appropriate way to talk to Iggy. I didn't want to offend him, and honesty he really creped me out. Aside from when he was being a sexist pig, then he just annoyed me.

"Dude, you scared the crap out of me!" Percy said, steeling my thoughts. He also embellished them with stronger words than id planned on using, but Fang didn't seem to mind. Good, I can curse around them.

Once they'd left, I confided my "voice" to Percy, who admitted he'd heard it twice today too. I don't like this at all, and I know Percy didn't either. My mind was searching for myths including possible monsters that had this power when…

"FLOCK MEETING!" being exclaimed by Max interrupted my thoughts, and then "you guys can come too." by Fang. Iggy also added "If you're not to busy making love to each other on the bed we haven't decided to be mine or his." I'm not going to like this guy.

"K, we'll be there." I replied as me and Perc **(A/N my nick name for Percy, pronounced like purse as in a woman's hand bag**) rose and hurried down the hall.

**Sorry its so short, I plan on updating again tomorrow with a longer chapter.**


	4. Chapter 4- the aco toco meeting

**(A/N- sorry it took me so long to update, its testing week and my brain is fried! Stupid standardized tests! Please excuse the bad writing my mind is inevitably going to fail. Like I said, my mind is fried.) **

Iggy's POV

I heard Percy call "just a sec" and a moment later heard the clunk of approaching footsteps and two bodies settling into a couch. I don't really know about the body language of the meeting, other than the eye roles and glares that were pointed out either for being hilarious or because max needed to tell me how much of a "sexist pig" I was being. But anyway, here's how it happened.

Max- "Angel, Gaz, and nudge, is all of your homework done?"

Angel and Nudge- "YES!"

Gazzy- "mostly?"

Max- "Well address that later."

Then the little, hmmm… I don't know if I can still call them little anymore, whatever it's not like I know how they look. So, the little-er kids wanted to know how the day went, and I think Gaz nearly fainted from laughing so hard after hearing about out incident in reading and writing. Then an awkward silence fell across the room, because we didn't know what we could and couldn't say around the new guys, Percy and Annabeth.

Then Angel announced, "Its ok Iggy, and Max, they have a secret too."

"As bad as ours?" I questioned her.

"Pretty much, but it's different so I don't know exactly." She answered almost immediately.

"Umm… were right here" Percy interjected quite bluntly. "How does she know?" I heard Annabeth whisper almost imperceptibly. If I barley heard it, I know my flock missed it. Since Angel seemed to be holding her tongue, I decided to be bold and answer myself.

"Oh, Angel? She just reads minds."

"Iggy!" Max reprimanded.

"What!? They were bound to find out anyway!" I replied in self-defense.

"Fine, Angel you think it's safe to tell them?"

"Yeah, they might even tell you their story too!"

"uhhhhhhh…" was al Percy or Annabeth could say.

"We're avian hybrids, 2% bird. Biggest difference is that we have wings" I say snapping out my fourteen foot pair.

"Iggy!"

"What! She said it was safe to tell them! Were cool right guys?" I ask in what I believe to be their direction.

"Yeah. I guess we are." Percy replied.

So…" I prompted. "What's your tragic childhood story?" I say with mock horror.

"Hers is different than mine, we only met like five years ago. Annabeth, yours is more dramatic. You go first." Says Percy.

Annabeth lets out an exasperated "Fine." Before continuing. "When I was around seven I couldn't deal with my family anymore, they treated me like I was a freak. So I left. I found Luke a while later, and we made our way to camp half blood. A few years later Percy came, and we've been friends since our first quest. We didn't start dating until around after the Labyrinth, right Perce?

"Yeah right around then." He responds.

"She skipped a lot." I say. "What are you?"

"Demigods." They reply simultaneously.

Okay then…?" I say before Percy goes on.

"I didn't find out until I was older, at a boarding school away from my old stepdad Gabe. My best friend there was Grover, and he's the one who brought me to camp. He was a satyr, half goat half human. Chiron is half horse half human too."

"That explains why the wings didn't freak you that much." Fang added, thank you captain obvious!

"Yeah, eventually I was told that I stole Zeus' lightning bolt, due to my being a son of Poseidon, and we saved it, bla bla bla yeah." Percy trailed off, he had my public speaking skills.

Max, trying to smooth things over, said that we were going to ask questions back and forth. They started.

"Were you born with the wings, do your parents have them, like how'd that happen?" Percy asked quite articulately.

"We were born with them because of scientists altering our DNA, and our parents don't have them. Most of us don't even know our parents." Max explains. I decide to ask next.

"Wait, demigod as in child of a Greek or Roman or whatever god? And who's her parent?" I say, trying to gesture toward Annabeth.

"That's a wall Ig." Fang added.

"You know what, er… who I mean!"

"Yeah as in children of the Gods. And our parents are Greek gods, my dad is Poseidon and her mom is Athena. She has a bunch of half-sisters, but my dad wasn't supposed to have kids so I'm the only one, besides my brother Tyson. But he's a Cyclops."

A bunch more random questions were asked, if you want to know the answers read the books Max and Percy wrote. Then Percy asked "how'd he go blind?"

Really, we've known eachother a day and he's asking that! "They were trying to enhance my night vision, the doctors messed up, and now I'm blind." I say in a rushed sentence before the memories come flooding back.

"Why are you and her dyslexic and ADHD?" I counter.

"We can read Ancient Greek, not English and the ADHD is our natural battle reflexes, they tend to come in handy when a monster is after you."

"Yeah, same with erasers." Fang mumbles.

I ask what time it is, and Max releases its well after two am, and the younger kids should've gone to bed hours ago, even if most of us are used to night watch. Plus we have another day of classes tomorrow, YAY! Note my high levels of sarcasm.


	5. Chapter 5 - the sick day

(A/N- I was very bored in between naps on my sick day off from school, and this popped into my mind. Now that I'm (almost) conscious enough to write it here goes! :)

Gazzy's POV

"Stupid Percy!" I shouted as Max tried to force me to take medicine that smelled like one of my "incidents."

"It's not … my … fault" Percy retorted lamely. He sounded pretty awful.

"OMG PERCY! WHAT HAPPENED!?" Annabeth exclaimed when she entered the floor. She'd been at camp half-blood visiting someone named… Rachel I think, all weekend.

"Stomach flu combined with cold and cough, I think a bit of the normal flu too. I don't even know." He replied, emerging from his room looking worse than he sounded.

"Here" Annabeth ran over, giving him some sort of square and a sip of a liquid that smelled like cookies.

Percy was fine within the hour, and I was only getting worse. "PERCY! Can I have some of whatever Annabeth gave you?"

"Sorry, dude. Only demigods can eat nectar and ambrosia. You don't want to know what happens when mortals eat it."

"You'll be fine soon, Gaz. Your extra fast bird healing will help!" Angel tried to soothe. But any all efforts were ruined because…

At that moment, Angel too was violently ill all over the common room's carpet! We called the school nurse for her, and she flipped out. The haz-mat team is on its way.

"Aright, I have good and bad news. Which do you want first?" asked a man in a plastic suit. He looked like an idiot.

"Bad!" we replied simultaneously.

"Well, you have a form of avian flu, we've never seen it naturally in humans before." He started. "Regardless, it should pass within 5 days." So like 2 or 3 Angel thought to me. "And you can't get it more than once. Badly, it's highly contagious and we need to quarantine this floor before it spreads."

"And the good?" Percy asked.

"You can't leave until each of you has had it, plus an extra three days afterwards. No school, no homework, and I'm ordering no make-ups to your teachers during this "stressful" time."

"Now, who has already had it?" the man asked. Percy stepped forward.

"Who has it now?" the man asked. Angel and I stepped forward.

"You two need to stay away from the doors, stay in the middle room as often as possible. Anyone else who becomes sick should do the same." And then they left.

Angel and I were really bored that night, and Max didn't even come to say good night to Angel. We here on this floor are in for a long week.


End file.
